28/08/2024 by Therapy For You

From self-doubt to self-assurance: Tips to build your confidence at work

Whether you’ve just started a new job, received negative feedback from a team member, or returned after a long period of absence, many of us can lack confidence in the workplace from time to time.

These feelings of anxiety are completely natural, and will often pass on their own. However, for some, self-doubt at work can become an everyday occurrence, causing unhelpful thoughts and feelings to rise to the surface.

As you can imagine, when most spend tens of thousands of hours at work across their careers, experiencing poor self-esteem on this scale can become a barrier to your personal and professional development, as well as your long-term mental wellbeing.

To help you feel more confident on the job, let’s explore low self-esteem in more detail, why it’s important to manage, and simple techniques you can try to build your confidence at work.

What does low confidence at work look like?

Confidence is the belief we have in our abilities and our judgement.

When we lack this certainty at work, we may start to feel less comfortable with ourselves or around other team members. It can even make us feel anxious, insecure and low both at work and in other aspects of our lives.

If you are someone who struggles to manage their self-esteem during the work day, you may also notice:

You are reluctant to take on new duties or responsibilities
Your mind is brimming with negative self-talk
You seek reassurance or approval from colleagues regularly
You find it hard to talk about your ideas or speak on your needs
You feel unworthy of joining in with team activities or discussions
You see yourself as an imposter

Just like other mental health challenges, there is no common consensus on what low confidence at work looks like. It can take many different forms and be brought on by various triggers, including:

Micromanagement
Negative feedback
Fear of failure
Interpersonal conflicts
Excessive workloads
Perfectionism

How can a lack of confidence at work affect me?

When low self-esteem is a constant throughout your workday, it can get in the way of your life both on and off the clock. With time, this can:

Reduce at-work performance

Confidence plays an important role in your success on the job.

If imposter syndrome is causing you to second-guess everything you do, chances are that the added pressure to perform will lead to mistakes and distractions that hold your true potential back.

Strain relationships

After so long, self-doubt can wear down your mental resilience and negatively impact your personal relationships.

This might mean you question your value to friends and family members, or take constructive feedback to heart, hurting your relationships.

Heighten feelings of stress, anxiety and depression

Lost confidence is also associated with stress, anxiety and depression.

These additional challenges can limit your ability to feel good and function day-to-day. In some cases, this may lead to social withdrawal and eating disorders, among other unhelpful coping behaviours.

What can I do to regain confidence in the workplace?

Now you know what low self-esteem at work looks like and the effects it can have, what can you do to manage these feelings, boost your confidence and establish a more positive mindset?

We’ve outlined some simple, practical tips you can try below.

1. Identify and challenge your low-confidence triggers

One of the best ways to improve your self-esteem at work is to spot and challenge the triggers that cause your confidence to shrink.

This all starts with the creation of a thought diary – a simple diagram that makes it easy to note any time you experience a dip in confidence.

Begin by splitting a piece of paper into a table with five columns – ‘Situation’ ‘Feelings’, ‘Thoughts’, ‘Revised thought’ and ‘Revised feeling’.

Moving forward, in the ‘Situation’ column, note down where you were, what you were doing, who you were with, and what was going on when your self-esteem dropped.

At the same time, in the ‘Feelings’ column, detail all the emotions you associate with the situation, noting how intense each was on a scale of 0 to 100%.

Then finally, in the ‘Thoughts’ column, write down what you were thinking at the time and rate the percentage you believed it. Leave the final two columns blank for the time being.

After you have collected a handful of examples, examine the thoughts in your diary, and note down any evidence that supports or disproves them.

This evidence should be factual, not subjective. That means your personal opinion should not be counted, but positive comments you’ve received from fellow team members can.

Take some time to gather your evidence. Once you have assembled everything you need, fill in the ‘Revised thought’ column. Here you will write down what you now think, having assessed the evidence objectively.

To finish this exercise, you will then rate how much you believe this new thought in the ‘Revised feeling’ column.

Over time, as you gather more insight and get better at challenging your thoughts, you will be able to find your way back to your comfort zone and begin boosting your confidence at work.

2. Use more positive language

Another effective way of building confidence at work is by changing the kind of language you use to describe yourself and your actions.

The words we use have power – try the following:

Instead of saying “I can’t”, say “How can I?”
Instead of saying “Difficult”, say “Achievable”
Instead of saying “Mistake”, say “Learning moment”

These more positive terms can help you take affirmative steps toward a more positive, confident outlook on work as a whole.

3. Write down your successes at work

Try as we might, nobody is perfect. Even the most experienced people in the highest seats of power make mistakes every now and then.

Rather than get wrapped up in things that go wrong, writing a list of the things you did well can go a long way to increasing your confidence.

If you can’t or simply don’t want to commit to this every day, noting down some of the highlights of your career can be a great way to instil some of the confidence you may have lost.

These don’t have to be on the same scale as a professional athlete or high achiever. Instead, focus on picking out the things you are proud of, whether that’s volunteering or putting together a great report.

And remember, revisit your list regularly to help keep you focused on your positives.

4. Exert confidence with body language

Although you might not suspect it, the way you carry yourself and communicate at work can have a bearing on your overall self-esteem.

By asserting yourself with confident body language where you can, you can begin establishing the self-esteem you need to excel at work, at home, and everywhere in between.

When sitting, keep your feet planted, shoulder-width apart
When talking, use your hands and open palms to gesture
When meeting others, maintain appropriate eye contact

5. Spend time with people that boost your self-esteem

From supportive colleagues to long-time friends, surrounding yourself with encouraging people in and outside of work can give you the perspective you need to realise your true worth.

As well as improving your workplace confidence, taking a moment to text a friend, organise a lunch break with a colleague or call a family member is a surefire way to strengthen your resilience against future setbacks.

6. Set achievable goals you can work on

Setting manageable goals at work is another proven way of uplifting your self-esteem, giving you an opportunity to prove your competence to your inner critic.

It doesn’t matter what you set out to achieve – it could be finishing a bulky report, or sending an email you’ve been putting off.

So long as goal setting focuses on your strengths, accomplishing any kind of target can fill you with a tremendous sense of accomplishment and confidence.

If you’re not sure how to get started, it always helps to keep SMART in mind – ensuring your goals are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-bound.

Need a helping hand building self-confidence at work?

When we lose confidence at work, it has the potential to not only affect our professional lives, but also our personal relationships.

Paying attention to your self-esteem is really important, especially in the workplace. And while these exercises can be a huge help, we know it isn’t always possible to stay on course with them, especially when negative self-talk is weighing heavily.

If you believe more structured employment advice is the best way to make self-confidence stick, our team of mental health professionals at Therapy For You – the local NHS provider of talking therapies in North East and South East Essex – can get you on the path to feeling better.

Through our free, first-of-its-kind online CBT course for self-esteem, and our wider range of mental health treatment options, we can help you develop valuable techniques to improve your confidence at work – all in a way that suits your preferences:

For more about Therapy For You and the employment advice support we can provide, get in touch with our mental health professionals today or use our free Limbic chat service.

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