Mind over mirror: How you can overcome body image issues

Our bodies are incredible. They allow us to experience the world around us, take in amazing sights and meet incredible people.

 

But sadly, a significant number of adults in the UK have negative feelings about their bodies and the way they look.

 

In a recent survey, 34% of British adults said they felt anxious and depressed due to how they perceived their physical appearance. A problem not confined to one gender, and something that men, women and non-binary individuals experience all over the world.

 

So what can be done about it? In this post, we explore what body image is, the impact it can have on your mental health, and the steps you can take to feel more comfortable with your appearance.

 

What is body image?

 

Body image doesn’t refer to our objective outward appearance. Instead, it’s how we think and feel about our looks subjectively, and how we believe others perceive them.

 

This isn’t restricted to our weight. We might worry that our nose is too big, our muscles are too small, our neck is out of proportion with the rest of our body, or our facial features are asymmetrical, for example.

1. It’s how you see your appearance
2. It’s how you feel about your appearance
3. It’s how you think about your appearance
4. It’s how you behave in relation to your appearance

Everyone’s features are unique, and so are the ways we perceive them. Some might have a positive opinion about their appearance, while others may become focused on their imagined defect, believing they fall short of the beauty ideals they see online.

 

If you’re unhappy with the way you look, this can put an enormous amount of pressure on yourself to change, resulting in negative thoughts, low self-esteem, and poor mental and physical health. This mindset is also often a root cause of eating disorders.

 

What can affect the way I perceive my appearance?

 

Much like our emotions, the way we think about our physical appearance and body image can change from month to month, year to year. This can be influenced by a range of internal and external factors.

 

Representation in the media

 

From the symmetrical faces of beauty models in magazines, to the immaculate teeth of influencers on social media. When you’re exposed to a certain type of look all the time, it can be hard not to hold yourself to those standards.

 

This exposure can allow an unhealthy perception of body image to take hold. You might feel pressure to lose weight to mirror the kinds of women you see in films, or build muscle to fit in with the most popular men in media.

 

Past experiences 

 

Were you bullied for how you looked at school? Did you receive unpleasant comments from family members about your appearance growing up? These past traumas can make it difficult to regain your body confidence and establish a healthy relationship with your physical features.

 

To avoid falling victim to this bullying again, you might find that you instinctively cover up moles that people used to pick on, or aggressively diet to avoid a certain body shape or face shape.

 

Body dysmorphic disorder

 

Another way the perception of your body image may change is if you live with body dysmorphia. This is a mental health condition where you become fixated on the flaws in your appearance, even if they’re unnoticeable to others.

 

Constantly thinking about things like the shape of your chin, the symmetry of your breasts, or your general build can make it hard to avoid comparing yourself to others. Eventually, this can lead to insecurity, as well as an unbalanced view of your physical appearance.

 

Pregnancy and childbirth

 

While pregnancy and childbirth are incredibly joyous occasions for many women, this period of change can also sadly leave some new and expectant mothers with a different opinion about their body image.

 

Scars. Stretch marks. The natural gain of weight. Whatever changes your body or appearance has undergone during this time might leave you feeling less confident or happy with how you look.

 

How can a negative body image affect my mental health?

 

Whether you’ve only just started to struggle with your body image, or have harboured negative feelings about how you look for years, issues like this can seriously impact your mental health.

 

Low self-esteem

If you feel unhappy about your nose, eyes, chin, lips or any other feature of your appearance, it can leave you with a lack of confidence and self-esteem.

 

Feelings of depression

When your mind is swirling with negative thoughts about how you look and your perceived flaws, you might start to feel low and depressed, or even have thoughts of hurting yourself.

 

Eating problems

If you feel as though you’re overweight or obese, you might begin to develop unhealthy eating habits, such as skipping meals or restricting what you eat, to achieve a certain body shape or feature.

 

Heightened anxiety

When you feel the need to constantly improve an area of your body, you may also become anxious about how others judge you. Perhaps you feel like your mole is being stared at when you walk into a room, or your height is the subject of whispers and gossip out the house.

 

What are the signs of poor body image?

 

Men, women and non-binary people. Older individuals, young adults and teenagers. Anyone from any walk of life can struggle with their body image, regardless of their gender, age or culture. 

 

If you think someone you know might feel this way, or you’re worried about your relationship with how you look, these are some of the most common signs of body dissatisfaction.

 

5 signs of body dissatisfaction

• You find you always have the compulsion to diet
• You regularly check your body – measuring your waist, pinching your skin, looking at mirrors, etc.
• You spend a lot of time every day on your hair, makeup and clothes
• You constantly compare yourself to others, often negatively
• You avoid situations where your body is on show, like socialising or swimming

3 ways to feel more positive about your appearance

 

When you feel upset or ashamed about the way you look, it can feel like an impossible burden to shake. Thankfully, it doesn’t have to be like this forever.

 

However low you feel now, with the help of some simple tips and guidance, you can develop a more positive way of thinking.

 

1. Reassure yourself with positive thoughts 

 

Remember, body image is subjective. It’s about what you think of your appearance, and how you believe others perceive it. 

 

To establish a more optimistic outlook and limit the negative impact this kind of thinking can have on your mental health, try focusing your attention on more positive, reassuring thoughts:

1. “Everyone is unique”
2. “My body does so much for me”
3. “People have other priorities than worrying about my looks”
4. “I admire myself and my appearance”

If you can think of any more affirmative thoughts, add these to your list and repeat them where you can throughout the day.

 

2. Avoid comparing yourself to others

 

Another way to improve how you feel about your body image and appearance is to try avoiding comparisons with others. 

 

While this can be difficult, establishing a healthier balance with social media can be a good way of resisting these temptations.

 

For everything else you see in films and in the media, try to take a more mindful approach. Remind yourself that the ideal bodies and faces you see on front covers and movie posters have been heavily altered, and aren’t realistic goals to strive towards.

 

3. Consider the language you use

 

Finally, if your relationship with your looks has become a source of stress and anxiety, be mindful of the language you use to talk about yourself and others.

 

While phrases like “I’m feeling fat”, “I look so old”, or “I hate my lips” can feel harmless in the moment, they can support your negative beliefs in the long term, and contribute to unhelpful feelings about your body image.

 

Whether you realise it or not, your words have power. So instead, try to make a conscious effort to use them more positively.

 

Need help managing issues with your appearance?

 

If you find it difficult overcoming body image issues, it’s important to know that you’re not alone, and the way you think about your appearance can change for the better.

 

By working with our team at Therapy For You, your local NHS Talking Therapies provider in North East and South East Essex, we can help you escape the shadow your imagined defects cast over your life, so you can develop a more positive mindset about the way you look.

 

Through our free, first-of-their-kind online cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) courses, and our wider range of other mental health support services, you can develop valuable techniques to restore your body confidence – all in a way that suits your preferences. 

• Find the right online courses for your needs
• Start private mental health counselling
• Register for ieso therapy
• Find group therapy sessions
• Begin therapy via video call
• Arrange counselling by phone

For more about Therapy For You and the support we can provide, get in touch with one of our qualified therapists today.