11/09/2024 by Therapy For You

12 common negative thinking patterns and how to overcome them

Every day, our minds are flooded with thousands of automatic thoughts – as many as 60,000 according to certain research studies.

We often let these thoughts wash over us instantly, never questioning their purpose or their accuracy.

As you may imagine, this can be a problem when we’re feeling upset, stressed, anxious or frustrated, as our thoughts skew toward the negative, causing us to expect the worst, bemoan our lot in life, or harshly criticise ourselves:

“I can’t do anything right”
“Why does nothing go my way?”
“Everyone thinks I’m useless”
“This is all my fault”

Moderate doses of negative thoughts can be controlled and overlooked. But if this kind of thinking is a constant presence in your life, it can shut down your positive or neutral beliefs, cause your mood to drop further, and create an unhelpful cycle that becomes difficult to escape.

Below, we will help you identify your unhelpful thinking styles, and teach you how to challenge negative thoughts using a powerful CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) technique called Cognitive Restructuring.

What are negative thinking patterns?

Negative thinking patterns, also known as cognitive distortions, are common types of unhelpful thinking that all people have from time to time – especially when we’re feeling depressed, anxious or stressed.

By grouping these thoughts into distinct categories, you can define your negative thoughts, making it much easier to address and reframe them.

We’ve broken down 12 of the most common types of negative thought patterns, explained what they mean and offered an example for each. While you’re reading, see if you recognise any of these in your own thinking.

From all-or-nothing to personalising – 12 common unhelpful thinking styles

1. All-or-Nothing Thinking

All-or-nothing thinking, sometimes called black-and-white thinking, is when you view situations in extremes. Something is either a total success or a complete failure – there’s no room for middle ground or shades of grey.

Example

After making a few mistakes during a presentation at work, you may think “I completely messed that up, I’m useless at public speaking”, ignoring parts of the presentation that went well.

2. Catastrophising Thoughts

Catastrophising is jumping to the worst possible conclusion for any situation. You anticipate the worst, stopping you from enjoying the experience itself.

Example

You’re having dinner with your partner, and they're quieter than usual. You think “They must be upset with me. What if this means our relationship is in trouble?”, causing you to assume the worst.

3. Compare & Despair

“Compare & Despair” is when you judge yourself against people you believe are handling things better than you are, whether in your personal life, at work or on social media. These unhelpful thoughts can cause you to feel resentful or inferior around those you feel are “doing better” than you.

Example

You scroll through social media and see a friend's post about their recent holiday, causing you to think “Everyone else has such exciting lives. My life is so dull in comparison”.

4. Demand Statements

Demand statements are when you place unrealistic expectations on yourself, using terms like “I should” or “I must”. These statements can put you under immense pressure, leading to frustration, disappointment or resentment when reality doesn't meet your expectations.

Example

While looking after your young child, you think “I should be able to clean the whole house at the same time as caring for my child”. When you can’t meet this ambitious goal, you may start to feel inadequate.

5. Emotional Reasoning

Emotional reasoning is a thought distortion where you believe your emotional reaction to a situation reflects reality. In other words, if you feel something strongly enough, you assume it must be true, regardless of evidence.

Example

You wake up after a rough night’s sleep and immediately think “I feel really tired and run-down this morning, so that means my whole day is going to be horrible”.

6. Fortune Telling

Similar to catastrophising, fortune telling is a negative thinking pattern where you predict something bad will happen without any evidence to support that prediction. This can cause you to avoid situations, or feel very anxious during those situations.

Example

You’re about to go for a job interview and think, “I’m sure I’ll mess up the interview. They probably won’t hire me, and I’ll never find a good job”, not considering any alternative.

7. Labelling

Labelling is when you assign broad, negative labels to yourself based on specific actions or behaviours. This label can then become an all-encompassing opinion that overshadows your future actions, affecting your self-confidence.

Example

You make a mistake while cooking dinner and think, “I’m such a terrible cook. I always mess things up in the kitchen. I’ll never be good at this”. This can cause you to avoid this activity because you’ve labelled yourself a terrible cook.

8. Magnification & Minimisation

Magnification and minimisation are cognitive distortions where you either exaggerate the significance of negative events (magnification), downplay the importance of positive events (minimisation), or a mix of both.

Example

When you receive a small amount of criticism on a work project, you may think, “This is really bad. I’m clearly terrible at my job, and I’m going to be fired”.

On the other hand, if you’re praised for your performance on a project, you could think “It wasn’t a big deal. Anyone could have done it”, dismissing your achievements.

9. Mental Filtering

Mental filtering is an evolution of magnification and minimisation – you only focus on the negatives and ignore the positives entirely. This stops you from embracing the joy in life, hyper-fixating on your mistakes when things go wrong.

Example

After hosting a party, you receive several compliments from your guests, but one person said they didn’t like the choice of music. You focus on this one criticism and think “The whole party went wrong, I’m never hosting one again”.

10. Mind Reading

Mind reading is when you assume you know what other people are thinking, often assuming they are judging you harshly without any evidence. This can cause you to avoid social situations and judge others negatively based on your own assumptions.

Example

You might choose to wear a particular outfit because you worry "People will think I look too skinny or big in this". In reality, most people are either too busy with their own thoughts, or they're actually admiring your confidence to wear what makes you feel good.

11. Overgeneralising

Overgeneralising is when you base your thinking patterns on a single event, or draw broad conclusions from one negative experience. Similar to all-or-nothing thinking, this eliminates any room for nuance.

Example

After a first date doesn’t go as well as you’d hoped, you may think “I’m awful at dating. This is why I’ll never find a partner and I’m destined to be single forever”, all from just one bad experience.

12. Personalising

Finally, personalising is when you take the blame when things go wrong, even if they are beyond your control. This unnecessary responsibility puts a lot of pressure to do things right all the time, and can cause your mood to spiral when something bad happens.

Example

When your child comes home from school upset after a difficult day, you may think “This is my fault. If I were a better parent, my child wouldn’t have these problems”, even if their distress has nothing to do with you or your actions.

Overcome negative thinking patterns through Cognitive Restructuring

Now you know some of the most common unhelpful thinking styles, you’re one step closer to breaking their hold over you and your mental health.

By putting a name to your negative thoughts, such as “Labelling”, “Mental Filtering” or “All-or-Nothing”, you start to recognise them for what they truly are – just thoughts, not facts.

Your next step is to challenge and reframe your negative thoughts based on real factual evidence. This is achievable through a highly effective CBT technique called Cognitive Restructuring.

Cognitive Restructuring is about using evidence both for and against a negative thought to reach a fairer, more realistic point of view.

This isn’t about simply replacing a negative thought for a positive one; instead, you adapt your original thought based on facts.

Let’s look at an example of this in action. After making a mistake at work, Alex felt very frustrated and thought “I’m terrible at my job. I’m sure I’ll lose it any day now.” To challenge this negative thought, Alex took the following steps:

1. Alex identified the negative thinking patterns behind this thought. In their case, it was a mix of Labelling and Fortune Telling, because they labelled themselves as terrible at their job, and predicted that they would lose their job.

2. Alex then created a table with two columns, one titled “Evidence supporting my thought” and “Evidence against my thought”.

3. In the first column, Alex wrote any factual evidence that supported their negative thought, like “I made a silly mistake in my report” and “My manager called me out on my mistake”.

4. In the second column, Alex wrote evidence that went against their thought, such as “I’m often praised for my work”, “I received a promotion a few months ago” and “I picked up on a colleague’s mistake recently”.

5. Alex reflected on all the evidence presented, and arrived at a more balanced thought: “Overall, I am good at my job. I made a mistake, but I know that others do too – it doesn’t make me a bad employee. I will learn from this and aim to do better next time.”

Reflecting on their thought in a logical, fact-driven way, Alex arrived at a more balanced conclusion – one that helped reduce the negative emotions they felt before.

By practising Cognitive Restructuring regularly, you can break free from the unhelpful cycles formed by your negative thinking patterns, helping you take steps toward a happier, more positive future.

For more advice and strategies to overcome negative thinking, check out our article “Breaking the cycle: How to confront and conquer your negative thought patterns”.

Better manage your negative thinking with Therapy For You

We hope this article has helped you understand the unhelpful thinking styles that may be affecting you day by day, and how you can reduce their hold over you through Cognitive Restructuring.

As powerful as this technique is, it’s important to know that this is just one way Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) can be used to help confront your negative thoughts and reduce the influence they have on your emotions and behaviours.

As the NHS Talking Therapies provider for North East and South East Essex, we can help you challenge your negative thinking in a variety of other ways with confidence and reassurance, through our wide range of free treatment pathways:

For more about Therapy For You and the support we can provide, get in touch with our specialist mental health professionals today.

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